2025 dating trends: Why ‘Spit Game’ is the new ‘flirting guide’ on the internet this Valentine’s Day
VALENTINE’S Day is around the corner, and if you’re single, you’re probably brushing up on your flirting skills. But there’s an interesting trend in the internet, netizens are ditching traditional “flirting how-to” guides and searching for “spit game” instead!
According to Google Trends, the term “spit game” has surged by a massive 65%, proving that dating lingo (and strategies) are evolving fast in 2025.
So, what does this mean for dating? Are we finally ditching cringe-worthy pick-up lines and moving towards a more confident, natural approach to romance?
Wait, what does ‘Spit Game’ even mean?
For those who aren’t familiar with the term, “spit game” is slang for confidently talking to someone you’re interested in whether it’s flirting, making a move, or just charming them with smooth conversation.
It’s less about rehearsed lines and more about authenticity, confidence, and reading the vibe.
Unlike old-school flirting guides that suggest overused pick-up lines such as: “Are you from heaven? Because you look like an angel”, spitting game is about being yourself while still bringing some charm and wit to the table. And let’s be real, confidence is attractive.
Mzansi’s dating scene has blessed us with some truly hall-of-fame-worthy pick-up lines. And if you're an avid consumer of TikTok, you’ve probably heard the now-iconic voice note from a Xhosa gent that had the whole country in stitches. His legendary line?
“I wish you were mine, besohlala sobay two, ubuzo hamba Monday.”
@supreme_swank_rsa Ubuzohamba Monday😭#foryou #tiktoksouthafrica #Roadto200k #mzansicomedy #tiktok #viral ♬ original sound - chumani
“I wish you were mine; we’d stay together, and you’d only leave on Monday.”
Now, while we appreciate the enthusiasm (and the long weekend offer), let’s just say Xhosa gents might need to workshop their rizz.
Because at this rate, it’s giving more “hostel warden” than “hopeless romantic”. But hey, at least he’s upfront about his intentions and offers commitment for a full 48 hours. Is it back to the streets for him after that?
Why are people ditching ‘How to Flirt’ for ‘Spit Game’?
The shift from Googling “how to flirt” to “how to spit game” says a lot about how dating is changing. Here’s why:
1. A more authentic approach to dating
Netizens even South Africans, are embracing realness over rehearsed lines. Whether you’re vibing in a coffee shop, sliding into someone’s DMs, or meeting at a braai, people are looking for more natural interactions.
One Reddit user summed it up perfectly, “People are tired of fake, scripted flirting. They want real connections. ‘Spitting game’ is about confidence and personality rather than cheesy lines.”
2. Social media and online dating
From Tinder to Instagram, meeting people online is the new normal. Instead of memorising corny pick-up lines, people are learning how to start engaging conversations and keep them interesting whether it’s through voice notes, memes, or witty comments under someone’s post.
According to a 2024 survey by Statista, over 60% of young South Africans say they’ve met a potential partner online.
3. Who doesn’t love confidence?
Mzansi has always had a strong culture of confidence and charisma. Whether it’s in music, fashion, or nightlife, South Africans know how to bring energy and presence. So, it makes sense that our flirting style is evolving to match that bold, self-assured vibe.
How to ‘Spit Game’ like a pro this Valentine’s Day
@daddy_.o00 Take notes oakes📝 #helaoakes #rizzgod #dyan #xhosanation #xhosatiktok #springbok #tiktoksouthafrica🇿![CDATA[]]>🇦 ♬ original sound - daddy_O
If you’re ready to level up your dating game and impress your crush, here are some expert-approved tips:
1. Confidence is key
Spitting game isn't about looking perfect, it's about feeling good in your skin. Stand tall, make eye contact, and don’t be afraid to show your personality.
Pro tip: If you’re nervous, start with light-hearted banter or a joke. Humour is one of the biggest attraction boosters!
2. Read the room and know when to walk away
Not everyone wants to be approached in the same way. If someone seems interested in leaning in, laughing, or making eye contact go for it.Part of having a good game is knowing your worth. If someone isn’t reciprocating your energy, don’t take it personally. If they seem uninterested, respect their space. If someone isn’t feeling it, don’t force it.
3. Keep it natural
Instead of robotic compliments, try something more personal. Instead of “You have beautiful eyes”, say “I love how expressive your eyes are when you talk”. See the difference? One feels generic, the other feels genuine.
With “spit game” becoming the go-to dating trend in 2025, it’s clear that netizens are embracing a more confident and authentic approach to romance.
Whether you’re single and ready to mingle or just looking to sharpen your social skills, the key takeaway is simple: be yourself, be confident, and have fun with it.
Ditch the outdated pickup lines and focus on genuine conversations, playful banter, and effortless charm. After all, the best game is the one that comes naturally.