What if it were your child? SA’s children are our responsibility

ONE OF my cousins told me of a game he used to play when he was very young. What he would do was, when someone was eating a vetkoek, or pie, or some slap chips that looked particularly appealing to him, he would stare at them with a forlorn, sorrowful, and most of all hungry look on his face.

He said that he was really, really good at it, because he regularly received a treat without even having to ask. Once he laughed as he told me how, when he got home one day, he had eaten so well due to his forlorn look trick, that he had no appetite at suppertime.

Even at that young age, it seems that my brilliant cuz had tapped into a basic human instinct to protect, provide for, and care about the young and vulnerable.

Granted, these days, there are many, many cases of violence and abuse against children being highlighted and reported in the media. We could be tempted to believe that humanity has lost its compassion. 

Good news all around

However, I suspect that we don’t hear of all the good news stories because there are few journalists who would actually go out and write a story about a woman who handed a half-eaten packet of slap chips to a child because he looked so hungry and forlorn. I can just imagine the comical and sarcastic comments that would appear in the comments on social media. South Africans are an entertaining bunch, and the way we say things can be hilarious.

But at the core, I still believe that here in Mzansi we love our children. We do care about their well-being, and the vast majority of our nation will come to their aid if they are in trouble. We are just wired that way.

Evidence of this view can be seen in how South Africans in one community rallied together when 22 SA laaities were stranded in the Iberian Peninsula recently. The children (aged 13-19) found themselves stranded after return flights were never booked following a football tour to Spain. 

Public outcry and a successful online campaign led to donations that covered airfares and secured their return to South Africa. 

The important thing is that local community mobilisation played a key role in resolving the crisis. And for this I am thankful; South Africans all over the country breathed a sigh of relief, I am certain.

How could this happen?

However, I am heartbroken and concerned that the incident occurred in the first place! How did the Academy that arranged the tour not see that there was a problem? How could the organisers take children from their homes, from their families and from the place where they were safe, and – promising them exposure on an international scale – expose them to even the possibility of the trauma they endured?

Was it asking too much to cancel the tour? Was it the financial considerations and the fear of the backlash of parents who had collected and paid massive sums of money – in excess of R50,000 – that made BT Academy decide that they are going to take the risk … or put another way, allow the children, with hopes burning in their hearts and stars in their eyes, to take the risk of the tour falling apart?

In the end, the Academy’s gamble, risking the security of South African youth, never paid off. The return for the majority of the team was not secured, and it took a massive, co-ordinated and scrambling effort from ordinary heroes back home, and generous, accommodating hosts in Lisbon to ensure that an even worse case scenario didn’t play out.

Not having children, I cannot imagine the trauma of the parents, but if this had happened to any of my nephews, nieces or even children I know, I don’t know if I would have been able to keep it together. 

A pattern we can’t ignore

What makes this more alarming is that it wasn’t an isolated case. In 2023, a football academy from Zimbabwe took a group of boys to the UAE for a “dream tour” that collapsed into disaster. The children overstayed their visas, were left without accommodation, and racked up hotel bills of over R300,000. They lived in squalor for months before the Zimbabwean government could bring them home.

And there are other cases, all alarming, all very unsettling. But in the end, what can be done to prevent something like this from happening in the future? This is what I would like to know.

Sadly, the combination of high hopes and low regulation is a recipe for exploitation. Young footballers across southern Africa — especially those from under-resourced communities — are increasingly vulnerable to shady operators who promise exposure, scholarships or professional opportunities abroad.

Football legend Didier Drogba has spoken out about this growing risk. In an article in The Guardian, he warned: “Unscrupulous individuals take money from youngsters and their families in return for opportunities that fail to materialise. Sometimes, those promises place them in grave danger.” 

What parents and communities can do

It’s important to realise that while the dreams of many young South African footballers stretch far beyond the country’s borders, parents and communities can take steps to protect children from falling into the hands of unscrupulous operators.

Here’s what every family — no matter their resources — should keep in mind:

• Verify the organiser: Any international trip involving junior players must be cleared by SAFA (South African Football Association) and the Department of Sport, Arts and Culture. Parents should contact their local SAFA office to check if the organiser is recognised and if the tour is authorised.
• Insist on documentation: Always ask for formal letters of invitation, travel itineraries, signed parental consent forms, and proof of accommodation and adult supervision abroad. Keep copies.
• Don’t hand over passports without guarantees: Never allow a child’s ID or passport to be held by organisers without a signed agreement detailing exactly who’s responsible, and how the child will be brought home.
• Watch for red flags: Secrecy, pressure for upfront payments, vague promises — these are all warning signs. If the organisers can’t answer your questions clearly and confidently, or if they insist that you will “miss out” on a golden opportunity if you don’t bite immediately, do the wise thing and just walk away.
• Involve your village: Even if you don’t have access to the internet or legal resources, involve a trusted schoolteacher, coach, faith leader or community elder to help you double-check the facts and ask the right questions. A little inconvenience and legwork upfront can prevent a world of pain, anxiety and expense later on.

Ultimately, dreams are precious — and sometimes fragile, but our youth are much, much more valuable. It’s our responsibility to protect them by ensuring every opportunity for our children is a safe and honest one.